Turning 16 Years Old
16
Seeing that transition from a not-quite-sure kindergartener to a determined-and-confident grade 1 student has been interesting. Instead of the unraveling of an onion to discover who a person is on the inside, you see the onion start to form. How they learn to tell stories to hide truths or exaggerate truths or falsehoods, and you’re left wondering, “What is true?” Most of the time, these stories are not as nefarious as adults would spin to extract a certain emotion or favour from a person. She is telling jokes, but every now and then, you catch her trying to cover up her tracks, which is generally to my amusement.
— Turning 6 Years Old
Like last year, I had a hard time deciding where to begin. I usually open these birthday posts with a pull-quote from the previous year, but this time I went back ten years instead. Reading about the first layers of Kylie taking shape then made me proud to be her father—and reminded me how much has changed, and how much has quietly stayed the same.
I can’t say I am proud of her abilities to hide the truth at times, which have only improved since then. However, I want to stay more positive and focus on her independence. That started to develop when she was young and continued to grow in the last year. I wrote about the switch of schools last year from a public school to an alternative school. The alternative school allows the kids to work ahead (and catch up easily if classes are missed). It added some other challenges with new-to-her kids being in these classes, but towards the end of the school year, things started to smooth themselves out.
When I was reading Wisdom Takes Work by Ryan Holiday, I was struck by this quote that really captured the spirit of this last year at the school:
This is the key to life: finding the classroom that works for you, that allows you to take over your own education.
Because an education is not something you “get,” it’s something you take. It’s something you make.
It took me back to my experiences in high school when I was around Kylie’s age. Grade 10 was really quite boring for me, so instead of continuing with another boring year, I followed a bunch of my friends into the Music, Art, and Drama (MAD) program for a semester in Grade 11. I loved that experience of creating and performing so much that I continued with it for Grade 12 and then onto University.
Grade 11 for Kylie has seen her take things into her own hands more just like I did. When we showed up for school registration a few days prior to the start of school, I was struck by how clearly she laid out her plan for the next year. She kept talking about graduating high school by the end of grade 11. I asked her counselor if that seemed doable, and he said it absolutely was if she put in the effort.
This fall, she’s had a few slip-ups that may not make that possible now, but some of the classes were still completed several weeks prior to the end of the semester. The one that has lit a fire under her is her Foods class. The students have had a lot of freedom to experiment with different recipes off the internet, on top of helping prepare the meals that the school eats for lunches. On several occasions, Kylie’s baked something that she has gone on to share with other students or teachers rather than bring it home. This is also the year that she’s started to develop some genuine friendships at school. They encourage each other as much as possible to show up for the day, which makes the school days more tolerable.
With me working out of the house and gone in the evenings, Kylie’s had to be more independent with cooking her meals. The Foods class has helped with this immensely, plus her experiences at Wendy’s and McDonald’s when it comes to food safety. She isn’t cooking KD or grilled cheese sandwiches all the time. Now she can make fajitas or fettuccine alfredo amongst other things.
While she hasn’t been working this past year like she had the few before, she’s been busy with concerts and social events. In one of those I can’t believe I let her do this moments, I let Kylie go see Riley Green at Prospera Place back in March. That was followed by Jon Pardi in the summer with my parents, though not sitting together. Both country artists.
I still don’t quite understand how she can enjoy Nickelback alongside country bands and Taylor Swift, but I do like that she enjoys listening to music.
The big highlight of the year, besides school, was a trip to Haugesund, Norway, with my parents to visit my brother and his family for Christmas. It was her first journey outside of Canada, and by far the longest flight she’s had to take. They only returned yesterday, so more stories will surely trickle out over the next few weeks. Overall, it was an enjoyable trip, with a lot of fun connecting with her younger cousins (nearly 6 and 3), plus my brother and his wife. If I remember correctly, they played Catan at least 6 times, which is impressive considering they had to wait until the kids are asleep to play.
Today, when she was sharing bits and pieces with me, she made the comment that she thought Norwegian seemed easy to understand. She quickly clarified that she meant when written, not orally, and referred to food first. I mean, milk is melk and bread is brød, but chicken is kylling and pork is svinekjøtt. Given how quickly she learned French when she was 5, it wouldn’t surprise me if she was able to pick up a new language relatively easily.
She also mentioned how much she missed Haugesund already. Of course, the family gatherings, but also the overall spirit of the small city. She liked being anonymous and not worrying about bumping into people she knew. The pictures she took show me that she was impressed by the older architecture and the area. She said she wants to go back. I think this may be start of a travel bug in her.
This coming year will be another year of big changes. Several months ago, the moment she was able to, she booked her knowledge test to get her Learner’s License today. It is the one thing I am not really looking forward to, but I know it is inevitable living in a city that is spread out. Next, she will surely graduate before she turns 17 at the rate she is going. Where she goes from there is anyone’s guess, but I can’t wait to find out.
Gratulerer med dagen, datteren min.
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